Since I haven’t blogged in months, I haven’t mentioned this topic yet. I haven’t really wanted to, I suppose, until I’d reached some kind of emotional distance from it. Those who know me and my love for cats in general knew that Misty was my favorite pet cat ever since I found her as a bedraggled kitten in some woodland camp many years ago. She had a personality that matched mine in some peculiar, emotional way, and was one of those cats who showed their affection for their favorite “human” in no uncertain terms.

So last summer, during a period of ill-health of my own, she became sick. I took her to the vet, got the general treatment advice, and I tried to nurse her back to health or at least a status quo - it seemed to work for a while, for she began to seem more energetic and her old self. But then she collapsed one day in July, and died rapidly as I tried to ready her to drive to the vet.

I’m used to losing pets by now, but this one was special. Didn’t help that it came during a time where I was very sick myself, which made me more emotionally vulernable I guess. I went through life on auto-pilot for a long time to avoid thinking about it. It’s distant now, but grief never goes away, it just becomes something you try not to think about for overlong because to do so is overwhelming and unhealthy for the mind.

At her time of death, she was one of two pet cats remaining from my original nine, and after the sweet-but-neurotic Baby is gone, I’m not sure I want any more cats for a long while. ie, I can’t replace Misty, and I’m not sure I want to try. For anyone who’s ever had such a close and inexplicable connection to a specific pet/animal, you’ll understand. If you haven’t, or if you think people who get so emotional over “just a pet” are irrational…well, it’s not something you can explain.

R.I.P. Misty.